I put a question mark in the title because I see a lot of posts about embracing singleness and how being single is great! It's not that I believe it's bad, it is good--if you learn from it. But, I contemplate whether the people who post and blog about being a happily single are really what they portray. Yes, I'm aware that there are some people that truly enjoy single life. And, I'm not knocking that. But, I also feel that some of the people that put up Memes and posts declaring their independence or love of being single have found more of a job out of posting those things than actually meaning it.
Personally, I choose to use my season of singleness as a time to grow and prepare for married life. The first time I did the whole marriage thing--I obviously wasn't successful. I believe that there are improvements to be made on both sides of any failed relationship, so I don't solely blame my ex for the demise of our marriage.
What am I doing to prepare?
I read books on being a godly wife, here are a few that I have found helpful:
In this book there are several things that were addressed that I found to be particularly interesting. One of them was the description of several personality types that men and women have and how they work together with others. The author also explains the importance of learning to be still and allowing the Lord speak to your heart and the heart of your future spouse.
Um...I like anything Heather writes about, blogs about, and posts because she's relatable and very transparent. :-)
I follow inspirational feeds:
I just make sure that the things I feed my mind uplift rather than make me feel like I need a bigger butt or my car isn't fancy enough, etc. I LOVE natural hair, make up, and food feeds! For the sake of time, these are the Instagram names of some of my favs.
I pray for my future relationship daily and I speak the word over my marriage:
Who said you had to be married to pray for your man? We are gonna be together for LIFE so Ima need to pray for him NOW! LOL
I practice cooking different recipes:
I love to cook. And, though I'm not 100% successful at it, I try my best to eat healthily. So, I try to find healthier versions of my favorite meals. Eating is one thing I like to do, so my food needs to taste good.
I workout and keep myself looking presentable:
Okay, what man wants to walk around with a slouchy looking woman? If you have a checklist of what your dream guy will look like, make sure you are someone he will want to have on his arm. NO! Looks aren't everything, but come on ladies, there are enough resources out there to help us out in this department. (YouTube, social media, books) USE THEM :)
Those are just a few things that I believe will help me prepare to be the best wife for my husband. Anyone that thinks they can live single, free, and not begin to prepare to submit while they are single will have a hard time doing it once they say "I do". Putting a ring on your finger is not gong to change your mindset. Wives are to submit to their husbands as unto the Lord (Eph. 5:22-23). So, if you can't do what God instructs you to do while you are single, how can you submit to an imperfect man? Practice now.
After all, the example I give my children as a wife, and as a woman in general, is going to affect their choices later on in life. So, I keep in mind that the things I choose to do now will affect generations after me. So while there are people portraying to celebrate their singleness while they are really empty inside, I choose to work on being whole and acquiring the skills I need to be a great helpmeet!
What are you doing to prepare for your next season in life?